It’s 12:12 am and I’m tired. So tired. I’m totally sorry I haven’t written for such a long time, but from last Tuesday on I had musical rehearsal with the school choir and on Friday was the final rehearsal and on Saturday the premiere took place. Since then we’ve had performances every day and besides that, our class works at the musical bar as well. It’s all very tiring and after the third performance you’ve got enough for the rest of your life: every day the same routine, the same songs to sing, the same tiredness you won’t feel until you go to bed.
But in between these blurry and hazy feelings of weariness there are also very exciting things: Primarily just being on stage. The excitement before the show begins, running in the hallways between the dressing rooms, preparing the cakes and sandwiches for the bar, even during the warm up of our voices.
And then, climbing the stairs backstage to the stage, waiting for the light to go off and waiting tensely for the begin. Then the light goes on again and you see the amount of people looking at you, also excited to be there at this very night. It’s at this time that you really wake up, that you concentrate and listen to the orchestra and the soloists, always ready for your entry (?).
In the middle a break of the usually twenty minutes; the stress, the pressure is there again; but you’re excited to hear the reviews from the audience. Selling cakes and drinks at the bar, drinking some water yourself, the last time to check your make-up and then – being on stage again.
And in the end the best comes: the applause. You go a few steps forwards, you bow – all together, hand in hand – you go a few steps back, letting the next pass for their applause. The choir, the dancers, the supporting actors, the leading actors; the orchestra, light men, sound men and finally the head team: Director, conductor, costume and stage designers, choreographers, assistant director and other important people. All the while you hear the clapping, cheering, whistling and you feel so good and content. You’re fully there, not the least tired or unmotivated; being on stage and seeing that you’ve made people happy with the people you like, with people you’ve worked with for such a long time, who know you and get you, and have experienced exactly the same as you – that’s the greatest thing so far lately.